World AIDS Day - What can a 7yo do? [or Planting the Seeds for Making a Difference]

I know I'm late with this one. December 1 is long past ... but the fight for awareness and a cure for AIDS goes on all year.

We've been watching RENT. I got the DVD and soundtrack for Christmas. Oliver really likes some of the songs, too--especially "Rent."

At 7-1/2 years old, the story is a little above his head [rated PG-13]. He hasn't seen the whole thing yet, but he plays the first 3 songs over and over and over. And we play the parts for the different characters--it's fun!

This weekend, he was asking about the characters and what happens to them (he still hasn't seen the whole thing). We started to explain HIV/AIDS, that some of the characters had this disease that knocks out their immune systems ... 1 character died ; 1 was sick at the end ; a few others had it, but were not sick. The rest of the group didn't have it.

Oliver would ask during the opening credits while they are all on stage singing "Seasons of Love," "Does he have it? ... What about him?"

Later, after supper, Oliver seemed pretty glum and quiet. He was working things out ... When he went to bed, the story he told Papa was about going to the rain forest to find a cure for AIDS. He talked with the local people and found "a red flower with an orange root." He brought home some of the seeds and grew them in greenhouses, and developed it into a drug to cure AIDS. Then the President of the United States gave him a gold medal, dinner in a nice restaraunt, and lots of money ...

I told him that if he could find a cure for AIDS, it would help millions of people in this world--not just the people who are sick with it, but their families and friends, too. He would be a hero.

I am pleased we are raising a kid with compassion for humanity. He doesn't know about "gay plagues" and the hate that has dogged people with AIDS. He sees the characters in RENT as people he likes, and he worries about them enough to want to find a cure for AIDS. WOW! Rent IS a powerful musical.

Maybe everyone should see it?

Get more information on World AIDS Day here and here.

"Ah, What Noodles, Boys" *

Our friend Vicki M. invited Oliver over to make home-made noodles.
He's been working the pasta machine for clay projects, so the equipment was nothing new to him. It was great fun!


The dough is a simple mixture of 2 cups flour, blended with 2 eggs, salt, and a little water until it's the right consistency.

Then they run it through the pasta machine a few times, sprinkling it with more flour, again until it's the right consistency--which is why it's a good idea to do this with someone who knows what they are doing.

With successive passes through the pasta machine, the dough gets thinner and more spread out. Finally we could run it through the spaghetti spindles :




We use a wooden dowel to catch the noodles as the come off the pasta machine. This also makes for an easy transfer to the drying rack.


The next task is to separate all the noodles on the drying rack so they don't stick together as they dry.


Vicki and Oliver with their Noodles!


This is the batch of dry noodles we brought home.


The Happy Chef with his bare noodles!


These noodles are also delicious with Renaissance Farms Pesto and the Sartori Asiago Cheese made by my cousin, Mike Matucheski.

My mom remembers her Bohemian grandmother making noodles when she was a kid. She said the kitchen was draped with noodles drying on every available surface. What a memory!

Vicki is wearing the apron her mother wore so many years ago. She gave Oliver the apron she used to wear all those years ago. We knew this was a moment for making memories!

* The quote in this post's title is from an Italo Calvino short story called "All at One Point" in his book, Cosmicomics. Listen to it at This American Life ("All at One Point" starts about 48 minutes into the hour, if you don't want to listen to the whole show.) Mrs. Fink always seemed to be making noodles ... "The only one of us that none of us has forgotten ... "Oh, if I only had some room, how I'd like to make some noodles for you boys" ...

Happiness

In case you're wondering what we DO with all that home-made vanilla in the last post ...
CL loves to bake cookies, and keep the home fires burning (literally).





Here are some things that make me happy :


Read Maggie's story here.
She's the original "Comeback Kid" in Dog form. She makes me happy, because she's a dog so full of JOY these days. What a difference from when we got her 2-1/2 years ago.

Oh yeah--and Oliver, too. This is what makes Oliver happy :
Pikachu, Dungeons & Dragons, and Little Blankie.

Real Vanilla (DIY)

The basic ingredients :
151 Rum (or Vodka)
* This is not for drinking.
* You need something with enough alcohol to pull the flavor out of the vanilla beans.

Real Vanilla Beans (4-6 beans) Try Penzey's.


Open the bottle of rum.
Pry off the flame-retardant cap.


Slice the vanilla beans length-wise.


Scrape out the seeds.
Take a moment to ENJOY the wonderful smell!


Drop both the pod/husk and the seeds into the open bottle of rum.

Then let it all cure quietly for 2 months.
On the bottle, write the date (2 months from now) when your Real Vanilla will be ready.

We use this in baking.
1 bottle lasts us about 1 year.
1 bottle of real vanilla costs about $30 for ingredients.

The Audacity of Hope

Never before have I felt like I wanted a picture of an elected official in my living room -- until now.

Doesn't he look like someone you could actually talk to, someone who actually listens? who inspires? I know we all have our work cut out for us in the coming years.

I am hopeful for a better world.

[Photos from the Barack Obama website.]

Marriage = Heart + Heart

Up until now, I've tried to keep Hidden Passages non-political. But I can't stand it anymore ... I have to speak up. On 37 Days, Patti Digh gave a call to action to become an advocate, to make a difference. "We want to counter those images and messages of divisiveness, exclusion and prejudice with images of inclusion, equality and acceptance." So here is my passionate stance :

Marriage = Heart + Heart.
Love is Love. It's as simple as that.

Gender doesn't come into it at all. Religion doesn't come into it at all (or it doesn't have to). I simply do not buy the Bible-thumping arguments about morality. It's bunk.

I'm still floored that the good people of my own state (Wisconsin) voted in favor of adding an (anti-) marriage amendment to our state constitution. This means our constitution now says that it's perfectly ok to discriminate against a whole group of people who don't number enough to make their own majority.

It is NOT okay. Gay people have hopes, dreams, loves, joys, fears and sorrows just like the rest of us. They ARE the rest of us. We're ALL in this world together. If a couple wants to celebrate their committment to each other, that should be supported.

My little family is NOT threatened by the gay couple down the street. In fact, I worry about their stability in a society that doesn't support their relationship. THAT instability is what threatens my little family, what threatens all of us.

"Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere." --Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

I truly believe this is an issue of civil rights and human rights and social justice.

"Prop 8 - The Musical" starring Jack Black, John C. Reilly, and many more... by Jack Black

While I like the sentiment, talking in a language conservative elements understand means framing it in economic terms. I prefer to appeal to the heart. Whatever works ... These hateful efforts will be defeated.

Signs

When I was young, my mom was a waitress at a little bar/pub that served food on Friday and Saturday nights. I remember sitting at the bar one night (Gramma & Grappa were there for dinner and I got to go along) and Ma was our waitress. I also remember a woman at the bar teaching me to spell my name in sign language--I can still do it :


And a few other phrases like "I love you" and bullshit.

I had so many ear infections as a kid, I could have lost my hearing ... I was on Penicillin for a year in kindergarten (bad idea, I know ...) before they took my tonsils out. So I always felt like being deaf was a path not taken in my life--not a scary one, just a different one. I'm glad that lady taught me some sign language.

Have you ever seen deaf poetry? I saw one in Madison once--Poetry in Motion! It's wonderful. One of the housekeepers at my hospital is deaf. Last year, her church choir performed at my hospital during the Christmas season. They did the show in sign language--they played music for the hearing audience, but it was so neat to SEE them. Again, poetry in motion--and it always brings tears to my eyes because I know that could have been me ... again, not a bad thing, just a different path.

"Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays" from Jeremy Neiderer (and me) :



Jeremy does a nice job with his videos--The focus is on his hands--and it's apparent he's having a good time doing it.  Here's another one :

VW Bugs and Starlight

My parents had an orange VW bug when I was a kid in the 1970s.

I remember sitting (back when seat belts were not compulsory) in the compartment behind the back seat when I was really little--but it didn't take long to grow out of that. I remember laying on my back there, looking up and watching the stars as Dad drove us through the countryside (nice and dark back there in the North Country Woods and farm fields. I could see a ton of stars with no light pollution) ... My mom was a waitress in those days and she worked weekends at a little bar that served food Friday and Saturday nights. So Dad would take us kids to Gramma & Grappa's house for a visit many of those nights.

Measure Your Life in Love

Ok--I'm a total Rent-head now! I finally saw the movie, and I wonder what took me so long? The themes fit in so completely with 37 Days.

First and foremost, this musical is about Love. The characters are treated and presented with compassion, even though they are dealing with issues of addiction, GLBT, AIDS, loss. They learned that it's all about the relationships, the connections we make. We remember moments in time, not minutes. Sometimes it takes staring death in the face to figure it out.

I go to such a cool church, way back in 2001, the Minister, Rev. Roger Bertschausen even did a sermon on The Theology of Rent. Glad to see I picked up on some of these important themes!

No Day But Today ...




Don't wait. Make sure the people you love know it.

Hey--Isn't the the Quaker Oats Guy?

This is the wrapper from a very tasty hot ginger drink given to me by my friend WCH who lives in Taiwan.

I never expected to see the Quaker-Oats-Guy on anything other than oatmeal in English-speaking countries. But here it is : A Ginger Drink from Taiwan. They've diversified their market. It truly IS a global culture!

Happy Holidays, WCH!

Oak Drop Sindle : Artifact of Family History

Back when CL and I were "an item," back in our courting days at Summit Ave. Coop, I took a workshop to learn spinning wool into yarn. At the time, I was a poor graduate student, too poor to buy a bona-fide spinning wheel. Drop spindles were an economical alternative. CL offered to make one for me.

I remember looking on--horrified--as he rigged up a drill in some non-recommended manner to sand the oak whorl of this drop spindle. I didn't want him to get injured trying to impress me ... I couldn't watch the making of this drop spindle.

In the end, this is what he produced. It's pretty, but not at all practical. Oak is too heavy and the whorl too wide (5 1/4 inches and 3/4 inch thick) to be a workable/usable drop spindle. The fibre always broke before it had enough twist to be strong. No wonder I never liked spinning with drop spindles!


My first ball of yarn, spun more than 10 years ago and dyed with Kool Aid (makes a good acid-based dye for small quantities). It's good to keep samples of these first efforts--you can see how far you've come with practice.

Bread of Life

No-Knead Bread Recipe courtesy of The New York Times.


Here's CL with his masterpiece! Home-made bread with an almost perfect crust and tender insides!

I am a lucky woman! Bring out the olive oil and garlic! And a little plum wine. Mmmmmh!

37 Days

What would you do if you only had 37 days left to live? What would you be doing with the precious time you had left? and with whom?

A few years ago, I had the brilliant realization that I was not going to live forever. Feeling mortal (then), I decided that my legacy would be my art-quilts. So I was in a mad rush to finish the Oliver quilt--because no one else would be able to do it. He's my kid. When it was done--I didn't die (not yet anyway). I also realized I was spending a lot of time in my sewing room, not talking to anyone, not building the relationships with those who mattered most--my family and friends. Although I'm happy with the result, the quilt lacked CONNECTION. That's been my theme for 2008. As a result, I haven't been quilting much and communicating more.

Now, if I only had 37 days left to live, I'd forget about my day job and spend all the quality time I could with my loved ones (CL, Oliver, my parents, Gramma, Janna, SKS, Ray & Rosita, Dottie, Caroline, my Anchors). It's not rocket science--no fireworks--no trips to Disneyland. Just quality time with the people who mean the most to me. It's the relationships that matter most in this world.

This summer, I was fortunate enough to reconnect with an old friend from my early days at Summit Ave. Coop. For 36 days we spoke or emailed almost daily. On the 36th day, I left for a trip to Scotland. Those 36 days were swell! I was really HAPPY to spend so much time re-connecting with this long-lost friend. I remember being on the plane over the Altantic Ocean, thinking, if I died tomorrow (Day 37), it'd be okay. They know I love them ... We're still in contact, and I hope this friendship continues the rest of our lives. Here's to you, SKS! Thanks for coming back into my life. I'm enjoying you here in my life!

Having just 37 Days left really makes me think about what's important, and what's not.

I'd also try to prepare my loved ones for life without me. I've learned a few things in my lifetime--losing a few of the ones I've loved. I want them to know that I'll still be around them. Those who love us, love us still even after we're gone. It's kind of like in Fanny & Alexander where the Dad was there as a ghost--observing--but he couldn't talk. He still cared about his family, but he couldn't do anything but FEEL for them. I want them to know that they can still talk to me (I talk to Sandy regularly) after I'm gone. It may be hard to hear my answers, but I'll be listening--I'll still be with them as long as they need me. Keba and Sandy have both managed to communicate with me since they left--It may not be as often as I would like, and it's a different kind of listening ..... I'd tell them, "You only have to think of me and I'll be there with you. It won't be the same, but I can still be with you ..."

There was also a scene from that Isabelle Allende book / movie, House of Spirits, where the mother prepared the grand-daughter for her death. What did she say?

"Just as when we come into the world, when we die, we are afraid of the unkown. But the fear is something from within us that has nothing to do with reality. Dying is like being born : just a change." Clara said. "Death would not be a separation, but a way of being more united" (p. 290).

My best friend, Sandy, died suddenly and unexpectedly 2 months before my son was born. I never got to say goodbye. Since then, I've had many conversations with her. It's a different kind of being together, a different kind of listening for her ... I can still hear her big laugh, still hear her saying, "I'm proud of you," and "Buttonsth" [sic]. She's still there when I really need her.

Part of that realization last summer was also a need to set down my family stories and lessons learned--the things I want my kid to know and remember after I'm gone. So I started this Hidden Passages Blog as a gift to my loved ones--friends and family alike.

Kate Bush sings, "These moments given are a gift from time. Just let us try to give the moment back to those we love, to those who will survive" (Moments of Pleasure).

Glen Phillips "Last Sunset"

The Popcorn Trout Incident

Just look at that gorgeous Rainbow Trout skin! Is there anything prettier in this world?


Me with one of the beloved rainbow trout.

At our house, CL does most of the cooking. But every once in a while, I get back into the kitchen just to prove I can still make a favorite meal.

One weekend, we'd gotten groceries, and I wanted to make trout ... We'd also purchased popcorn, and CL transferred it from the plastic bag to a glass jar for preservation, but it didn't all fit. So I left the remainder in the bag on the stove as a reminder to pop this batch of corn later that evening ...

Later that day, I got the trout ready and put it in the oven to bake. After a while, I heard a popping noise and checked the fish. I saw popped white popcorn kernals in the bottom of the oven with more popping by the second ... Puzzled, I asked CL, "Why is there popcorn in the bottom of the oven?" By then it had started to smoke ... I turned off the oven and went for a walk to sort all this out.

The bag with the remaining popcorn melted from the hot air coming up through the vent on top of the old stove. The loose popcorn fell down the vent into the hot oven and popped.

I cleaned out the popcorn and finished baking the fish a little while later. We had a nice trout dinner--sans popcorn.

Oliver's Green Tea

One summer, when Oliver was 2 or 3, he decided to make some "green tea ..."

One day, I made my usual cup of tea, but it just didn't taste right ... so I dumped it out and made a new cup. The second one also tasted funny. So I decided to replace the water in the tea kettle.

To my surprise, when I dumped out the tea-kettle, pea pods fell out! Oliver had stuffed the tea kettle with pea pods--unbeknownst to the rest of us. Eeesh!

Fall Color 2008

I went home to Polar, WI, this past weekend. I always like to see the Fall Color right around my birthday, so I make the trek home. These are pictures from my Dad's woods, which he gets to walk in every day with the dogs. Enjoy!